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Chains For Fun…and Profit

Report_cover_emarketer_2000769 Most of my chain restaurant blathering here is decidedly light, as it should be. I’ve finally been able to translate my mania into a more serious channel, though, and have written a report, “Digital Dining: Chain Restaurants Add Social Media, Mobile to the Menu” for eMarketer (my day job, if anyone has wondered). Unfortunately, it’s subscription-only so I can’t post the whole thing.

I’m ok with the constraints of business writing, though I’m a little bummed that my use of the word stalking (to describe that Eleven Madison Park Twitter incident last year) was edited into “overdoing it.” I will use this in the future, as in, that guy who looks like House MD has really been overdoing it with Anna Kournikova.

Chain Links: Sammy Sosa is Neither Mexican Nor Indian

Sosa

You can find poutine in Mumbai and in Toronto saag poutine exists. Perhaps there is a French-Canadian Indian Connection.

Relations are more muddled between India and our neighbors to the south. It’s hard to tell if this press release (is it a press release? I can’t tell what it’s promoting) was written by a non-native English speaker or a robot of some sort or cobbled together by that AOL Seed thing, but the author, whether human or not, does spell palate correctly. From what I can glean, there’s an udupi chain in Mumbai called Shiv Sagar selling quesadillas. Also in Mumbai at a place called New Yorker and in Delhi at a restaurant named Rodeo they serve “tacos filled with mushy rajma or enchiladas which can be stuffed, topped and surrounded with cheese and ketchup.” This is not a good thing. To confuse further, there is an eatery in Mumbai called Sammy Sosa that slings “Indian meets Tex Mex, the culinary equivalent of a hombre in a Stetson.” I’m not sure if this is a good or bad thing. This written work can be summed up by a theory from Solomon, an entity never introduced or given a first name or title anywhere in the text, “Indians don’t travel to Mexico much.”

I’m really getting bored by Cold Stone Creamery. All they do is open stores around the world. One just opened in Singapore (nine more are coming) Malaysia will be getting six and Cyprus, Greece and Brazil will be receiving their fair share of sweet ice cream teeming with mix-ins.

I do not know New Orleans-based Naked Pizza, but they have branched out to Dubai. If the company’s goal to open 100 stores in the Middle East over the next five years comes true it will change its name to N_K_D Pizza in more conservative countries.

Domino’s is now in Poland. Even though I never eat at Domino's or Cold Stone Creamery, I will always find pizza more interesting. What toppings will they have?

Dunkin’ Donuts will be increasing its presence in Asia and opening its first shop in Vietnam.

Sammy Sosa blackboard menu photo from Burp.com

The Baby Food Diet

MostTalkedAbout_FoodDiningBrands2

Subway may have surpassed McDonald’s in global locations, but according to Keller Fay Americans are still talking about The Golden Arches more than any other food brand. It’s number one with both men and women and nearly 60% of Americans mention a food and dining brand daily in conversations (I wonder if typing into the ether counts) with fast food dominating the top ten.

MostTalked_MenVsWomen

The biggest difference between the sexes is that women talk about Starbucks more and love Gerber. I like to think it has nothing to do with being moms and everything to do with emulating Jennifer Aniston.

Nature’s Bowl

Dailybread It may appear that the foot-long Chicago-style lobster hotdog is the biggest oddity at Pier 9, a new seafoody restaurant in Hell’s Kitchen. But it is not! The cheapest item on the menu is also the most notable (to me, and only me) because it’s a bread bowl for your soup. Only three bucks for that carved-out carb vessel. I so want this to be a thing for 2011. If punch can become trendy, why not dips?! Served in bread bowls, of course.

The Final Spicy Drumstick

20110306-bbqchicken-box

The generically named BBQ Chicken (not to be confused with Dallas BBQ where I also ate this week) is the subject of my final Fast Food International column for Serious Eats. I didn’t run out of steam; the city ran out of fodder.

The outdoor food court/strip mall next to our hotel in Penang (during a vacation March of last year—I’m afraid 2010 was lucky with Bangkok, Penang, Puerto Rico, New Orleans, San Francisco, Las Vegas and Montreal. This year has been a vacation bust so far and I have unlimited vacation days at work—such a waste) had a BBQ Chicken and I wasn’t familiar with the South Korean chain at all. It doesn’t seem to get the same accolades as BonChon or Kyochon…or even Kyedong...maybe not CheoGaJip. Which reminds me, I’m completely Korean fried chickened-out.

Time to move onto something new for the rest of 2011.

Tiny Bubbles

312Ruinart bdb I like to think I can’t be bought, but my weakness is games. Going on year 13 in NYC, I’ve yet to meet anyone who enjoys playing games like I do (Scrabble, Trivial Pursuit, Scattergories and even Foodie Fight–all gifts from game-playing relatives–languish in the closest). So, when the promised, mildly intimidating-sounding “sensory experience” at a Ruinart tasting and dinner turned out to be a game of sorts, I was won over. (Yes, this is a fully disclosed freebie, which I indulge in occasionally.)

Guests were given eight vials of natural fragrances that can be found in Ruinart’s Blanc de Blancs champagne and asked to match them to a list of 18. That’s ten extra to throw you off. Surprisingly, ginger, pink peppercorn, white peach, pineapple, cardamom and jasmine were all easily detectible. But I bombed on citrus. Not only could I not tell lemon from citron (this was the one that caught nearly everyone), I had originally confused the two for grapefruit and bergamot. Clearly, I need to build up my citrus-sniffing skills.

Ruinart sensory experience
The most basic theme Jean-Marc Gallot, president of the house of Ruinart, wanted to convey was that Americans should drink more champagne (and to drink it from wine glasses, not flutes nor coupes). I don’t think it’s so much of a recession-related issue, but that we associate sparkling wine with special occasions. New Year’s Eve for sure, maybe at a wedding, possibly a birthday and that’s it. I’m all for champagne (with a big C or little C) becoming a regular occurrence.

David burke kitchen

I already love sparkling wine with raw fish (I recently had a Domaine Chandon Etoile Rose with the omakase at 15 East) and the whole menu provided by David Burke Kitchen in the Treehouse Bar was seafood-based, showing off how an all-Chardonnay Champagne works well with delicate dishes like the uni and fluke sashimi with cured cucumber and orange tea vinaigrette and the john dory with guanciale, clams and cauliflower. The famous cheesecake lollipop tree was paired with Ruinart Rose.

Snacks included peanut butter-stuffed dates wrapped in maple bacon and fried grapes on skewers, as well as a jar of ricotta, eggplant and tomato spread—yes, part of that crazy new trend: toast.

For what it’s worth, these (as well as the other options of pretzel crab cake with green peppercorns and white beer foam and black bass with green herb butter) are all available on the regular menu at David Burke Kitchen. I suspect that our versions had been gussied-up with hits of flavor from the scent-guessing game. My sashimi had clearly been hit with cracked pink peppercorns.

Ruinart group dinner

It turned out that David Burke was in the house, kind of surprising for someone with numerous restaurants.

I’ll admit that Ruinart is not one of the names that initially springs to mind when I think Champagne, but now I’m biased towards looking for it on wine lists. I have a surprise birthday dinner planned at Marea (don’t worry; the boyfriend doesn’t read blogs) later this month, and I imagine Ruinart will be present. Marked-up to Central Park South prices it will probably be out of my moderate range, though.

Sponsored Giveaway: One Year of Unlimited BlackboardEats Passcodes

I just mentioned it the other day, but I’ll say it again: I’m a sucker for restaurant deals. As a kid I used to love reading through the chunky Entertainment Book (they still make these!) dreaming of exotic places to go like The Melting Pot even though my family only used the fast food-ish coupons…oh, do I miss Taco Time.

I’ll almost be sad when the economy gets stronger and discounts get their stigma back (at least in NYC). But in the mean time I’ve been using Scoutmob (free), VillageVines not so much because it costs $10 and BlackboardEats (recently raised to $1, likely to compete with VillageVines). I just used BlackboardEats for Mary Queen of Scots and have been holding onto a deal for The Mermaid Inn until Lent (no, I’m not Catholic, but someone in my household seems to get religious this time every year, and I’m here with the 30% off fish).

If you want to join in on the savings fun and live in or near NYC, Los Angeles or San Francisco, I have two BlackboardEats annual memberships (worth $20) to give away free. Currently, there is a special for 30% off Lowcountry (NYC) and deals for Mozza2Go (LA) and an offal menu at Betelnut (SF) showcasing fish head curry, one of my favorite dishes, are coming soon.

All you have to do is type the cheapest thing you ever did into the comments. I will pick two winners (I think I’m supposed to say at random) next Tuesday, March 15. Don’t be shy.

I’ll get you started. For me, it was patronizing a nameless Chinese restaurant in Portland that everyone called Dollar Chinese Food in the ground floor a hospital that served, well, $1 Chinese food. You’d get a scoop of rice, small, flimsy all-cabbage egg roll and a choice from the steam table, often kung pao chicken that was 85% chopped celery and carrots, all served on a paper plate. But it only cost one dollar!

Your turn.

Eaten Not Blogged: So Beefy

Old habits die hard. Eaten Not Blogged, which should technically be Eaten Barely Blogged, is what I ate during the past week but did not photograph and don’t feel like elaborating over yet can’t ignore completely. No one should feel compelled to read this; I just like keeping tabs on things.

Benchmark: The steak—a funky, dry-aged New York strip with great fat marbling—is very good at this semi-hidden but not at all speakeasy in Park Slope (the décor, not clientele feel more Bay Ridge/New Jersey). Everything else was a just ok B-. Poached egg in the salad was more firm than runny, the cocktail with Applejack (I always will order the Applejack drink) was kind of fruit punchy (with bright red commercial maraschino cherries, which I am fine with since they are a dying breed in Brooklyn) and the home fries and brussels sprouts were all softness, when I wanted crispy contrast.

The Full Schilling: One of the many non-destination pubs (there aren’t any destination ones, by the way) near my office, I eat lunch here maybe once a month and always get the steak salad (no, I don’t normally eat steak twice in a week) with blue cheese and a red pepper dressing. Just club soda because I’m afraid of becoming a daytime drunk. Believe me, I’m tempted to step out for a drink daily.

Mary Queen of Scots

Reimagined tartan upholstery, hipster toile wallpaper, a graying Eurasian server with a Scottish accent (I’m still waiting for young women to own this silver streaked look instead of dyeing) and a random Morrissey single I can’t even remember but want to say was "Now My Heart Is Full," all add up to yes, I’m liking Mary Queen of Scots. I’d almost forgotten this was the old Allen & Delancey space.

Despite the presence of larger dishes, the menu lends itself more to drinks enhanced by shared things rather than a more traditional appetizer, then entrée convention. Unfortunately, they were out of two of the six-or-so snacks during the early side of Friday night. No sweetbread beignets or scallop crudo.

Mary queen of scots charcuterie

Instead, we ordered a selection of charcuterie. Jamon de Bayonne, a veal cheek, pistachio and chestnut terrine and saucisson. No, you will not find haggis—all offal is Gallic. They do have scotch eggs and devils on horseback, though.

Mary queen of scots phoenix

The Phoenix (applejack, rye whiskey, maple syrup, and orange bitters topped with Champagne) wasn’t overly sweet, despite the man at the table next to ours being broken the news that none of the cocktails met his “Which are dry?” criteria.

Mary queen of scots pork belly

It was the substantial cut of gooey, crisp-skinned pork belly atop a plate of lentils coated in rivulets of foamy butter that made me think sharing would’ve been a better idea. It’s a lot of richness for one. Also, none of the mains really jumped out at me. The preparations may have been interesting, but I tend to shy away from roast chicken, salmon, moules frites and burgers unless I know that one is particularly outstanding. At least the extra side of fried brussels sprouts added a little green to the meal.

Mary queen of scots bathroom toile

When I first started seeing modern tweaks on toile back in 2004, Timorous Beasties, a Scottish design firm, was the name often mentioned. I do not know if this is their handiwork in the bathroom, but I would not be surprised.

Mary Queen of Scots * 115 Allen St., New York, NY

A Stroll Through Carroll Gardens

Tedhoney You know how experts on HGTV always advise homesellers to declutter and depersonalize so potential buyers will be better able to see themselves living in the space? (This common sense does not apply to Queens where it is assumed everyone likes wood paneling and/or copious statuary and/or sheets as curtains and/or a full line of Suave products lining the tub.)

The same should apply to restaurant ads. This Living Social email that showed up yesterday morning (yes, I’ve succumbed to daily deal mania and just experienced my first deal gone sour, which was bound to happen eventually) caught me off guard with its accompanying photo of Ted & Honey, a café/restaurant up the street that I’ve never had an inclination to visit.

There’s just so much going on, too much frozen action. Was this posed or was everyone caugh in the act? Why does the faded jeans guy have two iced coffees? Are the two plates of food also being brought to him? Where’s his dining partner?  Is it the tiny sweatsuit mom with a stroller as big as she is? I had a visceral reaction to her and her determined hunched shoulders as if she were about to barrel into the server full-speed. Of course, I immediately suppressed my negative assumptions because the Brooklyn child/childfree debate is cliché and unproductive for all and I’m too old and mature to mom-bash for sport, then a few hours later I read curiously toned, “A Mom Responds Before Crowding You Out of Your Local Coffeeshop/Bar” and became unsure of my emotions, then turned bile-y again with the reassurance of the equally icked-out commenters on The Hairpin, generally a place filled with smart, rational women.

Vinzees

In other Carroll Gardens decluttering news, I’m excited to see what Vinzee’s turns out to be. I’m also trying to figure out why Eater, in both of its mentions, refers to karaoke. Do they think that magic wand, illustrated in a shortened perspective, is a microphone?

I would also like to be excited about Café Bruno, the latest business taking over that doomed spot on Henry and Union streets, but can’t quite figure out what it will be like beyond this all purpose mission: "We want this to be a place that people feel comfortable, a place where you can come with your girlfriend, your kids or your friends."