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Bar Zeruko

Zeruko, where foie gras hides in every crevice and otherwise responsible adults leave sleeping infants unattended in strollers out front, turned out to be one of my favorite places to eat in San Sebastián. (In the late ‘90s a Danish mother got into serious trouble for employing this carefree parenting style in NYC—at a Dallas BBQ, no less.)

Zeruko facade

You see, pintxos bars are tiny, often narrow places, many standing room only and even though they are now safe for forming lungs (smoking was finally banned indoors in Spain at the start of 2011, much to the dismay of my loving-to-smoke-on-vacation self) parents haven’t taken this as the signal to start maneuvering strollers inside. Clue number one that I wasn’t in Brooklyn anymore.

Zeruko more pintxos

Clue number two was the pricing. I’ve thought about why pintxos bars don’t/couldn’t thrive here (Txikito being the only example I can think of). We have plenty of small storefronts and a love of creative food, but the ingredients would demand higher prices, as too the rent, and a small $12 plate of food—what I could see being charged in NYC—would make the whole thing overly precious.

Zeruko pintxos

In San Sebastián you may only have a little glass of wine (beer, cider are also acceptable) for the equivalent of $2 and one dish, maybe $4, and consume it in less than ten minutes. Time to move on to the next spot. Your 5 euro meal—something to savor, but not to fetishize—has earned you a brief spot at the bar or a ledge.

Zeruko pintxos more

Now, allow me to fetizishe the food. Zeruko differed from standard approach where cold dishes are displayed on the counter and warm ones are listed on a chalkboard menu to be ordered sight unseen on description alone. Here, everything available was piled onto the counter and there was a menu, some of the two matched up and most items if pointed at or asked for would be whisked to a back kitchen and gussied up in some manner.

Zeruko alcachofa y foie

Like the artichoke I saw being consumed by many. I mangled the word alcachofa with anchoa (anchovy) and had to point to sort things out. I wanted something light and vegetable-based. Ha, but what I was eventually served was deep-fried, stuffed with foie gras, painted in gold leaf and surrounded by a swirl of caramel sauce; a rich wallop consumable in a few bites. So, this is how it’s done at Zeruko.

Zeruko bacalao
A simpler package of something fishy, likely bacalao, swaddled in thin zucchini slices served straight from the counter.

Zeruko langostino glass

Langostino glass (I know this is the official name, even though I don’t understand the glass part, because on our second visit we ordered from the menu rather than picking by sight) turned out to also contain foie gras, possibly the most popular ingredient after mayonnaise in the region, along with a fruity compote. Foie gras was almost always paired with fruit and 95% of the time, apples. In this case, though, berries.

Zeruko cochinillo

Taco de cochinillo lechal confitado con mostaza dulce y Grany Smith. Once again, the taco that wasn’t. This time it turned out to be a square of suckling pig.

Zeruko morcilla y foie rebozado con pistacho
Morcilla y foie rebozado con pistachio
. Yep, more foie gras, blended with blood sausage, encrusted in pistachios and drizzled with raspberry sauce. Our drizzle was more of a dried-on speck because I asked for this dish just as they were about to toss out three that had been ordered and not wanted. Would I be ok with one of these? Yeah, I ate someone’s reject.

I did not try their famous “la hoguera,” featured on the cover of the one book I bought, Pintxos de Vanguardia a la Donostiarra. It’s likely you’ll see at least one person (usually whole groups) with the diy charcoal smoked cod atop a mini grill. It draws attention—just like a sleeping baby left alone in a buggy.

Bar Zeruko * Calle Pescadería 10, San Sebastián, Spain

That’s So Cheesy

So close…yet so far away. IHOP goes as far as setting up a marriage proposal in the ad for the new Double Cheese Scrambles, and then they don’t even use food as a ring presenter. What else is Stuffed French Toast good for?

Yes, and soon it will be available in the freezer case at Walmart.

Ordering Tacos and Chalupas in Spain

Caribean company

First it was Berlin getting real tacos, now it’s Paris. Soon, all of the European capitals will be rife with corn tortillas and salsa (and carrying on the fine tradition of websites that don’t do anything).

The Caribean Company, serving “ensaladas exoticas” and peculiar spelling, was in the mini mall only one block from my apartment in San Sebastián. I couldn’t justify a visit when only staying in town for one week. A few more days, though, and I would’ve caved– if only to see if they called tacos tacos.

Most of us know that tortillas are eggy potato omelets in Spain. I can deal with that. Tacos, it turns out, mean something very different, though.

Pulpo_gallega

Cross-sectioned slices of octopus tentacles are called tacos.

Borda berri taco de bacalao

This, a bacalao-based pintxo, is called a taco.

Best I can gather is that taco in Spain’s Spanish is akin to a plug.

Bergara txalupa & croquetas

Wait till Taco Bell finds out that the mushroom and langoustine fritter on the left is a txalupa, a.k.a. chalupa.

Naval museum

I also saw a chalupa in San Sebastián’s Naval Museum (my attempt at squeezing in culture–cheap, senior citizen culture–on the last day). It’s just Spanish for a small wooden boat, which isn't what's pictured on the ticket above.

Spain ‘Splainin’

Deep, insightful wisdom gleaned from travel will follow shortly (ok, it won’t). It’s more likely that I will just be talking about what I ate in San Sebastián for a while (and not until I catch up on my work work because I’m responsible that way) with a little bit of NYC thrown in here and there.

What I can say now:

  • Whenever in Spain, I know that I’m going to have to eat flowers. I’m not crazy about eating flowers (psychologically, not from a taste perspective) but it’s a fact of alta cocina. I ate 11 dishes containing flowers in eight days.
  • San Sebastián was severely lacking in cats; it’s a total dog town. I saw a fluffy Himalayan pop out of the bushes at Mugaritz and that was it. Latin American is also doggy. Southeast Asia is full of street cats.
  • Many women in Spain—not just older women, and I’m guessing not just smokers (80% of the population it seems)—have very deep voices, like that House of Sand and Fog woman deep. I don’t know how this happens. Also, 30% of the women over 50 in Bilbao had short magenta, pink or purple hair. This also can’t be explained. The Guggenheim effect?
  • King beds are really just two twins placed in a larger frame. This is not just the case in rentals like the apartment I stayed in on this trip, but also at modern hotels like I experienced in Barcelona. I caught part of a TV documentary (yes, I always watch TV on vacation) about a teen trying to obtain the abortion pill at pharmacies in Spain and the staffers just kept giving her pamphlets about natural contraception. I wonder if these beds count?
  • At La Cuchara de San Telmo I overheard a group of men, maybe German and Dutch, speaking in the bridge language of English about dining (and disparaging American food as overly battered and fried). One was going to Noma. Another was recounting a nine-course tasting menu eaten somewhere I didn’t catch. Afterwards, he “wanted to go eat a hotdog.” Good to see that I’m-still-hungry-$200-and-ten-plates-later isn’t a uniquely American rubric. Here, it’s “I could eat a Big Mac.” Neither battered, nor fried.

What I can show now:

 

 

Spring Break

CROQUETA So, I’m off to the land of Michelin stars and pintxos, the now-clichéd foodie honeymoon destination of San Sebastián. (I am still bummed that the Chowhound post about the destination involving a marriage proposal did not incorporate food. Couldn’t you imagine a croqueta encasing a diamond ring?) Luckily, I don’t consider myself a foodie and I’m not married or about-to-be. All should be well.

As usual when I’m out of town I won’t be blogging, but I’ll probably be Twittering (tweeting sounds even lamer) just not while on-the-go. Smartphones and travel haven’t been a successful combination for me.

I couldn’t get my phone to work in Oaxaca even though half the cooking class were using Blackberries and when I was stupid enough to pack my also non-working phone—the banh mi version I’m still mourning the loss of—in my suitcase while in S.E. Asia, it was stolen somewhere between Bangkok and Penang. Plus, I’m just way too cheap to pay for international data charges, despite the potential usefulness of digital handheld maps. How do others deal with phones when out of the country?

But more importantly, if anyone out there has been to Bilbao or San Sebastián—what did you eat?

Croqueta picture from La Más Bella

Chain Links: I Say Rice and Beans, You Say Basmati and Dahl

Peruvian chefs are in demand in South America and many of the hot ticket restaurants in Quito have one. Partners in Ecuador’s branch of Astrid y Gastón, celebrity chef Gastón Acurio’s upscale chain, also own the local T.G.I. Friday’s and Pizza Hut franchises. I wonder how our soon-to-open La Mar will fare.

I don’t imagine there will be Peruvian chefs at the new Carl’s Jr. opening in Panama City, the country’s first branch.

American franchises haven’t done so well down under. Ben & Jerry’s hopes to change that.

As the American chain barrage continues in India, adaptations are being made. Pollo Tropical’s rice and beans may morph into basmati and dahl, flatbreads will find a place at Wing Stop, Wendy’s will lose the beef—and that’s just the beginning.

German fast food chain, Wienerwald will be opening in Romania. Chicken appears to be their specialty.

Put An Egg On It

Schnitzel haus leberkase

Much like the now famous “Put a bird on it” Portlandiaism, for some time barnyardy chefs have been fond of putting fried eggs on just about everything. I am not opposed to this flourish in all its permutations.

And for no reason whatsoever, while entertaining Portlanders over the past eight days I consumed an unusual amount of eggs—from devilled eggs at Dinosaur BBQ where we were accidentally brought two servings to the monte cristo at Savoia, which was really an Italian eggs benedict.

Of course contemporary chefs don’t own eggs as garnish. At Bay Ridge’s Schnitzel Haus where entrees easily contain a full pound of meat, they serve a classic leberkäse, a veal and pork bologna loaf that is grilled and topped with fried eggs and surrounded by mashed potatoes and sauerkraut. With freshly cooked eggs, I made two breakfast servings this morning and there is still enough loaf remaining for multiple meals. Happy Easter, if I can stomach it.

Caputo's egg bread

After two visits to Little Italy’s Ferrara, I suggested my mom visit a non-touristy Italian bakery frequented by locals. Caputo’s brusque, “Who’s next? I said who’s next?!” chaos on their “busiest day of the year” according to one brassy counter woman, certainly provided that bit of Brooklyn charm lacking on Grand Street. No time for questions or leisurely skimming the glass case, my mom chose four of the sweet rolls baked around a hard boiled egg and topped with rainbow sprinkles.

I know I never encountered Italian Easter bread in Portland. And maybe it was new for the security at JFK, as well. Apparently, the holiday goods prompted a step-aside bag search when the visitors were heading back to the west coast. The damage on this particular roll was done by me, ripping apart wildly before photographing.

 

Palatefreak

Abba-zaba-sourapple

In the late ‘90s I had a fantasy of writing a photo-driven book about candy bars, obscure and beloved, maybe with behind the scenes factory shots. It would be called Wunderbar and it would be awesome. At least it was in my mind, but publishing was a mystery to me (it still is, frankly). I didn’t even know where to begin. Obviously, crowd-sourcing and provide-me-with-content tumblrs were an unheard of concept at the time. Even Food Network’s Unwrapped hadn’t yet aired.

My go-nowhere concept faded from memory until 2004 when Steve Almond’s Candyfreak: A Journey through the Chocolate Underbelly of America, a kind of memoir, kind of a love letter to the little guys, came out. Ah, so this is how it’s done. Or rather, one way to do it. The same year Nigel Slater’s Toast, a memoir with candy-centric leanings, was also published.

I read Candyfreak at the time (it just now occurred to me to read Toast—I’ll put a library hold on it shortly) but as with many things in life, half-a-decade later and I’d completely forgotten how it was written or any details beyond the overall topic. I’ve been giving another once over as a refresher.

All was good until I reached page 135. In describing the Goo Goo Cluster factory thusly, “Joanne led me through the warehouse, gingerly stepping over palettes on the ground.” I had two gut reactions. It was exciting to see my bugaboo word in this context because it’s the one usage you never see mangled because it’s rarely used at all. But I’m fairly certain he meant pallets not palettes.

I tried to put the homophonal transgression out of my mind and focus on the story, but on the very next page I was sucker punched again!

The same was true of ABC Fruit Chomps. They tasted funny. But they tasted funny because my palette has come to define Starbursts as the standard of normalcy when it comes to fruit chews.

Once you spy a palate abomination, there’s no way of unseeing it or forgetting it. Two in two pages? And then in the next-to-last chapter, the crime occurred again, as if to make sure I was really paying attention until the very end. Oh, I was.

The American palette is accustomed, by this time, to chocolate and peanut butter. We think nothing of the combination, in part because both substances melt at the same temperature.

No! This was particularly painful because the candy being discussed, Abba-Zabba, is easily one of my favorite candy bars (why did I never see the green apple limited edition!?). I remained defeated for the final 18 pages.

The only salvation was seeing that quaint last-decade oddity, an appendix of websites with unwieldy URLs like snickers99.tripod.com/candymainmain.html and www.smm.org/sln/tf/c/crosssection/namethatbar.html, attempting to capture the ephemeral in print.

Food Blogs…Blah, Blah

Bloggers Yes, I already posted about the ELLE food blogger article when it came out in print. No, I’m not trying to milk my fleeting minutes of fame (well, a bit maybe) but now that they’ve put it online I feel like it is my duty to link to the new format.

The Cheesiest

Trader vic's crab rangoon

It’s rare that I use the Goodie Obsession tag anymore. I guess I don’t gush over particular foodstuffs like I used to. Even so, crab rangoon, a.k.a. cream cheese wontons, play a prominent role in my favorite junk foods repetoire. In fact, I ate two-thirds of a box of frozen, bakeable cream cheese wontons from Aldi (NYC’s only location is now in Rego Park, you know) for dinner last week.

So, I was very excited to see the snack featured as part of Serious Eats’ “Tiki Week.” I’ve totally made them with fake crab, myself. No need for the real stuff unless you are able to procure a can of Phillip’s lump meat from Costco and think your friends deserve it.

Also today I learned about a Latino take on the cream cheese wonton served a Patacón Pisao, a Venezuelan shop in Elmhurst. The tequeño is essentially fried, dough-wrapped cream cheese and is practically as inventive as using fried plantains in lieu of bread as they do in their namesake patacón.

Photo from Chicago’s Trader Vic’s, New Year’s Eve 2010.